Remembering Uzza

19 The Hajj: So Many Pilgrims, Not Enough Time

(3.0 draft)

UzzaGerry: Getting back to the Hajj, if you have the means and the wherewithal you have to perform the Hajj at least once in your lifetime.

Uzza: Yes.

Gerry: If you don't, Allah will not let you into His Paradise. You will have to spend eternity in Hell.

Uzza: Probably.

Gerry: Two million is about the maximum number of Hajj pilgrims Mecca can accommodate because of the limitations of a finite space and the set-in-cement example of the Prophet.

Uzza: That is the why the Saudis impose quotas by county.

Gerry: That means, the Saudis decide who’s going to Hell.

Uzza: I think I know what you’re getting at.

Gerry: 1.5 billion divided by 2 million is 750. If every Muslim alive today wanted to do the Hajj it would take more than 750 years to accommodate them all. How could Allah have mandated a ritual that you must perform or spend an eternity on fire in His Hell that the vast majority of believers cannot fulfill even if they wanted to?

Archie: Makes you wonder about the big guy's ability to see the future doesn't it?

Uzza: Muhammad insinuated that the end of the world would occur during his lifetime or shortly thereafter when there was plenty of room for everyone at the Hajj. This may have had something to do with it. I don't know.

Gerry: Could Allah have been setting up the believers for a fall or perhaps lied, not only about knowing what will happen next, but being able to do anything about it?

Uzza: His angels did accuse Allah of wanting to spread mischief when he sent Adam to earth. But, I don't think it was His intention to put so many believers in the impossible situation you described; a situation that is bound to get worse if no solution is found with people joining Islam in record numbers, if only to be on the winning side.

Archie: And get in on the plundering while the getting is good. Maybe the Chinese will able to turn the tide and solve the Hajj accommodation problem.

Gerry: By doing to the believers what the believers are doing to the unbelievers. That would mean they are no better than them.

Archie: They kill on the promise of manufactured broads who will allow them to screw them every which way non-stop for an eternity. To kill them in self-defence and to protect your family from sex maniacs is not the same, not the same at all.

Bob: I agree with Gerry. I don’t like this idea of all this killing.

Archie: They started it.

Bob: The Chinese could expand their re-education camps. We don’t kill sex addicts and the delusional, we try to cure them. That is the humane thing to do.

Uzza: It’s also not the same to kill someone simply because you can’t bring yourself to say a simple phrase.

Archie: It’s more than that, and you know it.

Gerry: Surely scholars have given some thought to how to save, what has to be billions of people, from going to Hell because the Hajj can’t fit them in.

Archie: Sorry, never crossed my mind.

Uzza: We could rebuilt the Ka’ba along the lines considered by Muhammad after Gabriel showed him the Ka'ba in the sky and do away with the circling and all the other rituals. In one door and out the other, and your obligation is fulfilled.

Gerry, Bob, Archie: There's a Ka’ba in the sky?

Uzza: The Bait-ul-Ma'mur is directly above in Paradise. The angels enter by one door and leave by another. Much more efficient.

Gerry, Bob, Archie: The angels have their own Hajj?

Uzza: Yes, as weird as that sounds.

Bob: What about aliens?

Uzza, Archie, Gerry [taken aback] WHAT!

Bob: What if there is intelligent life out there and they too chose to submit to the Will of Allah. If the Hajj cannot accommodate the people of earth how will it accommodate aliens?

Archie: Haven't you been listening, there is no there, there. It is all an illusion, aliens not included. The only there, there, according to the Koran, is Paradise a few miles up, and like on earth it is filled with mindless automatons who spend much of their existence in awe of the great illusionist. Not only is there no intelligent life out there, there is not that much here either, when you think about it.